0.000000 2.500000 Is God trustworthy?
2.500000 5.000000 Hi, I'm Sarah.
5.000000 7.000000 And I'm Mary Beth.
7.000000 9.000000 Join us as we seek to answer this question
9.000000 12.000000 through whole-hearted conversation.
12.000000 14.000000 Discover the wit and wisdom
14.000000 16.000000 that comes from being anchored in Christ
16.000000 18.000000 and connected to one another.
18.000000 21.000000 This is Trustworthy.
21.000000 34.000000 [music]
34.000000 37.000000 On today's episode of Trustworthy.
37.000000 39.000000 If I'm telling my one-year-old,
39.000000 41.000000 no, I can't.
41.000000 42.000000 spend time with you right now.
42.000000 46.000000 Was that wrong because I was doing my paid job?
46.000000 50.000000 When I'm living my life surrendered
50.000000 54.000000 to what God has for me to do.
54.000000 61.000000 Then anything I do is the job that I'm supposed to be doing.
61.000000 70.000000 [music]
70.000000 73.000000 Mary Beth, tell us what we're going to talk about
73.000000 75.000000 on today's episode.
75.000000 77.000000 Only time will tell Sarah.
77.000000 81.000000 We're going to talk about work,
81.000000 83.000000 where we made for it, what does it mean,
83.000000 86.000000 what is it, what does it look like in our lives
86.000000 92.000000 and times that that may not have gone down so smoothly.
92.000000 94.000000 Yeah.
94.000000 101.000000 And how can we trust God in this arena?
101.000000 102.000000 How does He show up?
102.000000 104.000000 How has He shown up for us?
104.000000 108.000000 How has He proven trustworthy in our work?
108.000000 114.000000 When I think about work, I think about my job.
114.000000 119.000000 I spent 16 years working in the automotive industry.
119.000000 123.000000 Started out selling cars and worked my way up to management.
123.000000 128.000000 I got my degree, my business degree,
128.000000 131.000000 in automotive management and marketing.
131.000000 139.000000 I was pretty much on that path looking to take advantage
139.000000 143.000000 of some of the programs that were available for minority dealers.
143.000000 146.000000 There was not much representation.
146.000000 149.000000 The car business back in the 90s for women.
149.000000 152.000000 There was some opportunity there.
152.000000 154.000000 That was my plan.
154.000000 158.000000 I enjoyed it.
158.000000 162.000000 Once a car guy, always a car guy, kind of catching your blood.
162.000000 165.000000 But then I stopped.
165.000000 170.000000 I had a three and a half year old who needed a mom all the time.
170.000000 175.000000 And that was a tough transition.
175.000000 179.000000 And it kind of made me question my identity
179.000000 186.000000 because if I wasn't doing deals and making money for somebody who was I.
186.000000 192.000000 So was that always like when you were growing up or you were young adults.
192.000000 199.000000 Was your mind always on the career path or was it, oh, I'll have a career.
199.000000 200.000000 And I'll be a mom.
200.000000 203.000000 What was your thought going into working life?
203.000000 206.000000 That's a great question.
206.000000 214.000000 I think I probably focused more on getting a different life
214.000000 217.000000 than the one I had growing up.
217.000000 223.000000 Then I was on whether I was going to be a mom or what my career was going to be.
223.000000 228.000000 I mean, when I was in kindergarten, I wanted to be a nurse like my grandma.
228.000000 233.000000 And then by the time I was in high school, I wanted to be a lawyer or no, probably middle school.
233.000000 239.000000 And then by the time I registered for college classes, I was undeclared at a liberal arts college
239.000000 243.000000 because I had no idea what I wanted to be when I grew up.
243.000000 247.000000 And the car business was never like, oh, this is what I want to be.
247.000000 248.000000 I just kind of fell into it.
248.000000 251.000000 And it just really was good for me.
251.000000 254.000000 I had a very strong work, I think.
254.000000 256.000000 I have my parents, I think, for that.
256.000000 263.000000 So working 60 hours a week, six days, sometimes I would go in on a Sunday and do paperwork.
263.000000 265.000000 That was not a big deal for me.
265.000000 267.000000 It's just what you did. You got it done.
267.000000 273.000000 So it was definitely a good fit, but I came to it that way.
273.000000 279.000000 And then I was able to get my business degree because I'm in business and they have this automotive program.
279.000000 284.000000 So that's, I kind of came to it circuitously.
284.000000 294.000000 But like many women, I believe, you know, in my late 20s, 30, I really wanted to have a family.
294.000000 298.000000 I was ready. I had been successful. I owned a home.
298.000000 300.000000 I was ready, but I didn't have the family.
300.000000 306.000000 I don't know if that really answered that question, but yeah, it wasn't something I thought of from when I was young.
306.000000 308.000000 I just kind of, yeah.
308.000000 315.000000 Well, I think just thinking about transitions and kind of changes, I always like to think about how to expectations fit into that.
315.000000 321.000000 So I was just wondering what going into it, if you had specific expectations or not for what your looks is going to look like.
321.000000 329.000000 Yeah. And I think as I grew older too, I expected that my family life would look a lot like my family life did when I was young.
329.000000 342.000000 It was really pretty good. I mean, family was really good about going on little adventures or trips or going skiing or fishing or, you know, whatever it might be as a family unit.
342.000000 345.000000 We were pretty tight knit and I really definitely wanted that.
345.000000 354.000000 But I just wanted to be in a more urban area. Of course, now I'm older and I feel differently back then.
354.000000 357.000000 Well, I have a question for you.
357.000000 374.000000 So you are a professional working woman who is also the mother of two children who are just both almost school age and their boys, which I have one son.
374.000000 377.000000 So I think there's definitely there's a club.
377.000000 385.000000 But tell me kind of how your career transition happened and kind of how that is for you.
385.000000 387.000000 So I grew up in the South, like deep South.
387.000000 398.000000 And my life expectation was, oh, I will be married when I'm 24 and having kids when I'm 26 and I will be a mom and that.
398.000000 408.000000 And those things did not happen. And so when I was in college, I kind of changed a couple times what I was majoring in.
408.000000 415.000000 But basically coming out of that knew I wanted to do some kind of communications related to politics and policy.
415.000000 422.000000 And so just kind of made it happen. That's and makes it sound way too easy. I didn't know what I was doing when I finished school.
422.000000 429.000000 I moved to Nashville for a couple years and was just doing sales and then ended up kind of going to DC and figuring out my life.
429.000000 436.000000 So my whole thought was, well, this is my life. So I'm going to make it work.
436.000000 447.000000 And so I was there for over a decade and really enjoyed it. I really enjoyed working. I enjoyed the type of work I was doing and being in DC. I loved all of it.
447.000000 454.000000 I would always say to people the only thing that would take me away from DC is, oh man, which sounds so cheesy.
454.000000 461.000000 But it was true. I had no intention of ever leaving unless there was like a dramatic life change. And then a dramatic life change happened.
461.000000 469.000000 Stephen and I met when I was in DC. My husband Stephen. So I think becoming a mom. The thought at that point was.
469.000000 477.000000 I had already had these dreams kind of growing in the career side of my life. I still had these dreams about having a family of being a mom.
477.000000 483.000000 And so then it was, can I hold both of those dreams? Does God want me to let go of any of those things? And so.
483.000000 493.000000 Yeah, I mean, the transition has looked like changing the type of job and that not necessarily type of work with the amount of work that I do.
493.000000 510.000000 And when we moved away from DC, I mean, it was a very intentional decision for our family. Quality of life, decision for both of us to be able to work less and be available more for our family and just life in general.
510.000000 518.000000 It has been a massive privilege to be able to make those types of decisions to do what's best for our family and be able to do it.
518.000000 529.000000 And transition, I think the hardest part has been. Now I kind of have the pull of I don't work full time or kind of part time. And so I feel in between these worlds of.
529.000000 537.000000 I'm not a stay home mom, but I work from home. I'm not a full time working mom in an office somewhere because I'm I am home all the time.
537.000000 544.000000 My five year old is still around sometimes when he's not at preschool. And so yeah, it's kind of being swirled around in this world of.
544.000000 555.000000 I don't fit. And these little boxes of either full time working mom or stay at home mom. So what what am I? So yeah, that's where my transitions have thrown me for a loop.
555.000000 565.000000 You're an awesome mom. Yeah, well. Can ask my son downstairs when he thinks of. Yeah, well, let's maybe not get our kids opinion.
565.000000 578.000000 Something you said was resonating with me. Well, I'm not a full time working woman at an office. But yet I'm not a stay at home mom.
578.000000 593.000000 And I think that's interesting because when I left my well, I could sort of stop working full time. I had my son. And then after my maternity leave, I went back part time, which is pretty helpful because I think it.
593.000000 606.000000 It wasn't as big of a transition. And then it gave me room to be a mom of an infant, but also still have that identity piece that was so strong.
606.000000 618.000000 But then when I stopped working for someone else altogether, that was weird. It was really weird. There wasn't a steady paycheck coming in.
618.000000 628.000000 And really my career has not been something that has really been a top priority for me for strangely enough.
628.000000 638.000000 Good decade. And I would say that I've struggled really kind of struggled.
638.000000 651.000000 And it wasn't until it finally occurred to me that the work that God has for me is the most important job.
651.000000 663.000000 So I'm a mom. That's my number one job. Being a wife and a mother is what my calling is.
663.000000 676.000000 And there's more capacity there, whether there should be or not, that's not what we're here to discuss. We're here to discuss our lived experience and the hopes that someone else can also hear it and be helped.
676.000000 686.000000 What really helped me was to realize that when I'm living my life surrendered to what God has for me to do.
686.000000 697.000000 The work that He's prepared in advance for us to do the good works. Then anything I do is the job that I'm supposed to be doing.
697.000000 704.000000 As it happens, I do not get paid for any of the things that I do in money.
704.000000 731.000000 But it's still important. And I've had to look for affirmation for myself, whether it be from other people or just from the satisfaction of a job well done, even if I'm the only one that knows that the pillow cases are folded in thirds and stacked according to color in the linen closet.
731.000000 742.000000 Okay, that's kind of a joke. But I know that it was a good job done or maybe the pillow cases are clean and they're in the linen closet. That's also a good job done.
742.000000 757.000000 Or maybe they're clean and they're in a pile on top of the bed, whatever, whatever it is. And by the way, just to say our identity is not in clean and folded laundry properly put away our identity is somewhere else.
757.000000 763.000000 That was just an example for it. Yes, it is an example of a lot of. But there's joy. But there's joy.
763.000000 764.000000 But there's joy. Yeah.
764.000000 779.000000 There's joy in preparing food for your family. There's joy in turning in a report or getting a client the exact plan or product or whatever that they need to be able to launch their product.
779.000000 797.000000 So I think for me, what I've learned, and I'll just say it's for me for Sarah, when I can realize that everything that I'm doing is for the glory of God and that the things he brings me is the things that I need to be doing.
797.000000 803.000000 Then I feel like I am doing the work I'm supposed to do.
803.000000 819.000000 So this reminds me of some verses in Isaiah, Isaiah 29, 15, "Woe to those who go to great depths to hide their plans from the Lord who do their work in darkness and think who sees us who will know.
819.000000 830.000000 You turn things upside down as if the potter were thought to be like the clay. Shall what is formed say to the one who formed it you did not make me can the pot say to the potter you know nothing.
830.000000 842.000000 And to me, this cuts to my tendency to think about how I think my career should look, what I think my work should be what it should look like.
842.000000 851.000000 I'm making my own plans inside my head and neglecting to acknowledge who's the potter and who's the clay here.
851.000000 867.000000 Not that I would admit that I'm actively trying to hide my plans from the Lord, but that's exactly what I'm doing. If I'm not relying on his plan and living for what he has given me to do, I'm secretly but not secretly working on my own plan trying to make it happen.
867.000000 872.000000 Meaning on your own understanding and not his not trusting him but trying to trust yourself.
872.000000 882.000000 That's right. And it's a sign that I don't view that his plan for me is trustworthy. Right. I don't view that he himself has my best in mind.
882.000000 901.000000 And so that is part of what my wrestling with has been with the concept of work because it's exactly what you're saying when when we can step into the perspective of is all of this that I work that I am doing, whether it is paid employment work or
901.000000 929.000000 home parenting work. Am I doing it for the glory of God? Am I looking for the opportunities to say this is where he is leading? This is what he has provided viewing all things through that perspective gives us a greater satisfaction work because he is confirming our steps because it's when I have tried to push back against what he has given me or trying to force things to happen that aren't happening.
929.000000 933.000000 That's where my discontentment has often arisen.
933.000000 945.000000 Actually, what I was thinking about earlier, you know, Ephesians 2 10 says for we are God's handiwork created in Christ Jesus to do good works which God prepared in advance for us to do.
945.000000 965.000000 And I think we are the pot and God is the potter because we are his handiwork and we're not I mean, okay, yes, I mean God does want us to work out our faith with fear and trembling and he does want us to ask him questions and to yell and scream and try to figure things out.
965.000000 978.000000 Yes, I believe that but also we're not going to look at God and go, I'm a pot. Actually, as I'm saying this, no, sometimes I do, I do look at God and say, I'm a crappy pot.
978.000000 990.000000 But really what I'm saying is, oh God, you may crop and he doesn't know he doesn't. I'm having a moment. Right? Talk it out. Talk it out.
990.000000 1007.000000 No, I mean, seriously, if I believe that God is supreme and he loves me and is that old poster that used to be ubiquitous everywhere when I was younger said, I know I'm somebody because God don't make no junk.
1007.000000 1016.000000 Do you remember that? No, I do not, but I'm so glad you shared that. Yeah, I know of somebody because God don't make no junk.
1016.000000 1032.000000 But how many times are we so distrustful of him that we say, boy, I really suck. You made a crappy pot. But no, just as that verse in Isaiah said, does the pot ask the potter? No, we don't.
1032.000000 1052.000000 And so how can I question? And again, this is the process that I've gone through and what I was just sharing just a few minutes ago is that I had to come to the realization God has uniquely created me and he's prepared good works in advance for me to do. Well, I best be up and doing them.
1052.000000 1064.000000 And I have seen, especially since being married and walking through life with someone else, it's not just me in my own head, right?
1064.000000 1082.000000 That when we have we being my husband, I have surrendered intentionally had conversations where we are saying we are surrendering this job search or budget discussion or whatever it is to Lord and seeking his guidance on it.
1082.000000 1094.000000 He has been so faithful to honor whatever we have let go of given to him in ways that we would not have been able to foresee. Yes, I had a time. Yeah.
1094.000000 1107.000000 And so those are the ways that I think God continues to remind us of his faithfulness and how he is trustworthy. So when we moved to Pennsylvania, I left my job and started my own consulting business.
1107.000000 1122.000000 And we decided as a family to just live on my husband's income like for our monthly budget and that my income would we would have separate discussions about what we want to do with that money because it was completely unpredictable.
1122.000000 1136.000000 And the way that God has honored that and it has taken the pressure off of me because I get wrapped up in my own head about my expectations of how much I be working how much money should I be making how well do we what do we do.
1136.000000 1147.000000 All torn around my head about those kind of things that God has really shown up and been faithful in saying look when unexpected things have come up because we have stuck to this budget.
1147.000000 1160.000000 It's not a devastation when my business might lag for a few months. So just not to pat myself on the back. But just to say that God has consistently shown up in big and small ways.
1160.000000 1176.000000 The more that we are continuing to go to heaven say okay, you tell us where to go you guide us here you confirm if we want to pursue this direction we're giving it to him and kind of seeking confirmation that those are the right steps.
1176.000000 1183.000000 As I'm saying that loud I don't want it to sound like it's as simple as saying okay God.
1183.000000 1196.000000 So what's next and he does because he doesn't always so I believe a body and motion stays in motion and when we start moving we can be redirected.
1196.000000 1212.000000 But it's important to start moving and so think of it like a course correction you're going to sail across a lake okay well you have to tack but you can change the angle of your trajectory to end up in a completely different place.
1212.000000 1225.000000 And at the beginning of that route it may only be one or two degrees but you can end up the farther you travel the destination is going to be in a very different place.
1225.000000 1239.000000 So I think it's helpful sometimes I get analysis paralysis where I'm trying to work through something or make a decision and I just end up doing nothing.
1239.000000 1251.000000 Like maybe podcasting just I have accountability and the form of my dear friend doing it across from me.
1251.000000 1268.000000 But when we move God will direct and so I think that having a goal in mind and I love the sort of the structure in the expectation that you are clear about and the boundaries that you guys made in your budget this is a smart thing to do.
1268.000000 1297.000000 Okay so maybe that means that we both don't get to drive the news car or oh maybe we get to not go out to dinner five times a week or whatever those sacrifices are for people takes intentionality and I believe that the Lord will he tells us and I mean the proverbs and the ways that he talks to us and instructs us as you know wise man keeps track of what he has and we know the proverbs 31 woman sets aside choice stores of food and oil.
1297.000000 1307.000000 This is just about stewardship and so I know that he honors that so yes you're right it's not easy and we just have to start moving and then he'll tell us what to do and where to go.
1307.000000 1321.000000 Which it kind of brings me to sort of a turning point in our conversation but before we turn to that point before we change our trajectory by a couple of degrees.
1321.000000 1332.000000 Is there any other comments that we want to make about this work piece and how maybe we've had difficulty trusting that for this.
1332.000000 1347.000000 Yeah I think the pandemic was when all this kind of blew up in my face for my for me personally at the time I had a one year old and a three year old when everything shut down and so.
1347.000000 1355.000000 Trying to work and have children at age and my husband was suddenly working from home all the time.
1355.000000 1362.000000 I quickly realized that my identity of being a mom was running.
1362.000000 1366.000000 Right smack into my work life and.
1366.000000 1369.000000 I felt a constant.
1369.000000 1381.000000 Anxiety about am I doing too much of one or the other am I not doing enough of one or the other if I'm telling my one year old no I can't spend time with you right now like was that wrong because I was doing my.
1381.000000 1387.000000 Page job all of these things were really hard for me during the pandemic and so I think that what.
1387.000000 1391.000000 I learned coming out of that was.
1391.000000 1400.000000 There are things that are inside of us whether it be idolatry or self righteousness or all these things that.
1400.000000 1408.000000 We may not even realize are there until the buttons are pushed and so for me the whole concept of identity with work.
1408.000000 1420.000000 My buttons hadn't been pushed that much until the pandemic said and and what came out was not pretty and I think the pandemic uncovered some uncomfortable truths for.
1420.000000 1427.000000 Many made out people yeah and so I think the silver lining of it were the.
1427.000000 1435.000000 Beauty for matches of it and I still feel like I have not fully recovered from all that are learned everything I need to learn.
1435.000000 1447.000000 Is how counter cultural it is to really have our identity be in Christ and who he says we are and that that's it that's all it needs to be.
1447.000000 1451.000000 Walking with him having him be.
1451.000000 1461.000000 The one who is who we are emulating everything else is secondary it's not that it's not important it's just not as important as that so whether it is.
1461.000000 1466.000000 Yes I'm a mom I'm a wife but first and foremost.
1466.000000 1473.000000 I'm a child god and I'm his so how does that identity impact all of the rest of them has been.
1473.000000 1477.000000 A continual learning lesson.
1477.000000 1479.000000 What about you.
1479.000000 1490.000000 So Mary Beth this concept of identity really brings to mind a post that I wrote for our blog or will a jail woman's blog I think it was.
1490.000000 1505.000000 A couple years ago but it talked about feeling small not knowing or not feeling that my identity was as good as he maybe other people's and in this I wrote about.
1505.000000 1510.000000 Leaving my career when people asking what do I do like.
1510.000000 1516.000000 I'm a domestic goddess and make a lot of sandwiches.
1516.000000 1522.000000 I actually think that I put domestic goddess on applications for things probably.
1522.000000 1526.000000 What has been people's responses to that they don't really don't know what to say.
1526.000000 1528.000000 They've heard domestic engineer.
1528.000000 1530.000000 Okay and they've heard homemaker.
1530.000000 1535.000000 Yeah but domestic goddess they're like okay it was worshipping you in this.
1535.000000 1539.000000 So Mary Beth has been in son.
1539.000000 1542.000000 I mean I do I miss my career.
1542.000000 1561.000000 I miss the car business anyway but we'll put a link to that that particular blog but in that piece of identity we have a little bit of responsibility because we have to let go of our own human passions and desires for like.
1561.000000 1571.000000 I want my identity to be go here's this successful career business owner or whatever it could be by the world standards we have to give that up.
1571.000000 1580.000000 Galatians 524 those who belong to Christ Jesus have nailed the passions and desires of their sinful nature to his cross and crucified them there.
1580.000000 1586.000000 This is where living by the spirit let us follow the spirits leading in every part of our lives.
1586.000000 1592.000000 Let us not become conceited or provoke one another or be jealous of one another.
1592.000000 1600.000000 That's Galatians 24 or 26 in the NLT that's.
1600.000000 1602.000000 That's very convicting.
1602.000000 1615.000000 So I really admire you for having a consulting business that you work from home and I don't know if I would I would like not to use the word jealous.
1615.000000 1628.000000 I'd like not to use that word but I really admire that and it's something that I yeah I would love to have some business yeah be great.
1628.000000 1633.000000 Oh yeah but then I would have to make some decisions.
1633.000000 1647.000000 I'd have to give up some other work that I do which I find extremely fulfilling and doesn't pay me in money but pays in other ways.
1647.000000 1671.000000 And by the way is also the work that God's called me to so boy that is tough thing and that kind of leads again to the next turning point in the conversation of how has God fulfilled me in this area of work.
1671.000000 1685.000000 Ephesians 2 8 through 10
1685.000000 1710.000000 For it is by grace that you have been saved through faith and this is not from yourselves it is the gift of God not by works so that no one can boast for we are God's handiwork created in Christ Jesus to do good works which God prepared in advance for us to do.
1710.000000 1725.000000 Thank you for listening to this episode of trustworthy. Come back again next week and we will have the conclusion to this conversation and Mary Beth and I will be putting in some overtime as we turn back the clock.
1725.000000 1730.000000 This is trustworthy.
1730.000000 1745.000000 Hey y'all Mary Beth here.
1745.000000 1761.000000 Sarah and I are so glad that you chose to listen to our podcast and while we think that we're awesome friends to have we just wanted to clarify that we are not mental health professionals and want you to know that this podcast should not take the place of any paid professional advice.